You probably believe you’ve dialed in reality by now. You know how you roll and how the world turns. You think it’s a rat race or a breeze, chaotic or linear.

You may even think you know who you are in the hearts and mind of people who meet you and interact with you.

How would your life change if you changed the channel?

That’s really all you have to do to keep becoming the person you want to be or could be. You have to keep changing – or at least re-considering: what you think, what you do, where you go, who you hang with, how you look, what you wear, what you carry and what you really want in this life.

No, I don’t mean leaving your job today to become an astronaut in training, if you haven’t yet been accepted to that program. I do mean putting astronaut on your life list so your mind can do the work to get you into space. It will, if you will.

If you can say it, you can do it.

I own that phrase but you may borrow it.

Fill yourself with the feeling that you are missing something great. Talk to yourself about how much you don’t want to miss out.

My niece Lexy came from New Jersey into LA last week. For the first time, she saw a totally different self: same girl, just radically different aspirations. She breathed in the sun, without the humidity. She long-boarded on the strand, she wore high heels for the first time, she talked late into the night about coming back, to go to UCLA.

She was an “only child,” for the first time – not sharing airtime with an older brother and sister.  She began to understand that her world could be “Lexy-centric.” She realized the soundtrack to her life wasn’t fixed with the voices of people whose job it was to tell her what to do. That’s their job now, but it won’t be forever.

So much unfolded in such a short time, simply because Lexy boarded an airplane that took her into a different direction and a never before seen dimension. The complexion of her life is changed forever, simply by putting herself on unfamiliar ground. And, she looks good with a tan.

Where do you need to go in order to re-consider who you are now or might be in the future? More from Nance…

• Personal Brands: Wait for It
• Personal Brands: It Don’t Mean a Thing

You can find Nance on
Facebook
LinkedIn
Twitter

You probably believe you’ve dialed in reality by now. You know how you roll and how the world turns. You think it’s a rat race or a breeze, chaotic or linear.

You may even think you know who you are in the hearts and mind of people who meet you and interact with you.

How would your life change if you changed the channel?

That’s really all you have to do to keep becoming the person you want to be or could be. You have to keep changing – or at least re-considering: what you think, what you do, where you go, who you hang with, how you look, what you wear, what you carry and what you really want in this life.

No, I don’t mean leaving your job today to become an astronaut in training, if you haven’t yet been accepted to that program. I do mean putting astronaut on your life list so your mind can do the work to get you into space. It will, if you will.

If you can say it, you can do it.

I own that phrase but you may borrow it.

Fill yourself with the feeling that you are missing something great. Talk to yourself about how much you don’t want to miss out.

My niece Lexy came from New Jersey into LA last week. For the first time, she saw a totally different self: same girl, just radically different aspirations. She breathed in the sun, without the humidity. She long-boarded on the strand, she wore high heels for the first time, she talked late into the night about coming back, to go to UCLA.

She was an “only child,” for the first time – not sharing airtime with an older brother and sister.  She began to understand that her world could be “Lexy-centric.” She realized the soundtrack to her life wasn’t fixed with the voices of people whose job it was to tell her what to do. That’s their job now, but it won’t be forever.

So much unfolded in such a short time, simply because Lexy boarded an airplane that took her into a different direction and a never before seen dimension. The complexion of her life is changed forever, simply by putting herself on unfamiliar ground. And, she looks good with a tan.

Where do you need to go in order to re-consider who you are now or might be in the future? More from Nance…

• Personal Brands: Wait for It
• Personal Brands: It Don’t Mean a Thing

You can find Nance on
Facebook
LinkedIn
Twitter

You probably believe you’ve dialed in reality by now. You know how you roll and how the world turns. You think it’s a rat race or a breeze, chaotic or linear.

You may even think you know who you are in the hearts and mind of people who meet you and interact with you.

How would your life change if you changed the channel?

That’s really all you have to do to keep becoming the person you want to be or could be. You have to keep changing – or at least re-considering: what you think, what you do, where you go, who you hang with, how you look, what you wear, what you carry and what you really want in this life.

No, I don’t mean leaving your job today to become an astronaut in training, if you haven’t yet been accepted to that program. I do mean putting astronaut on your life list so your mind can do the work to get you into space. It will, if you will.

If you can say it, you can do it.

I own that phrase but you may borrow it.

Fill yourself with the feeling that you are missing something great. Talk to yourself about how much you don’t want to miss out.

My niece Lexy came from New Jersey into LA last week. For the first time, she saw a totally different self: same girl, just radically different aspirations. She breathed in the sun, without the humidity. She long-boarded on the strand, she wore high heels for the first time, she talked late into the night about coming back, to go to UCLA.

She was an “only child,” for the first time – not sharing airtime with an older brother and sister.  She began to understand that her world could be “Lexy-centric.” She realized the soundtrack to her life wasn’t fixed with the voices of people whose job it was to tell her what to do. That’s their job now, but it won’t be forever.

So much unfolded in such a short time, simply because Lexy boarded an airplane that took her into a different direction and a never before seen dimension. The complexion of her life is changed forever, simply by putting herself on unfamiliar ground. And, she looks good with a tan.

Where do you need to go in order to re-consider who you are now or might be in the future? More from Nance…

• Personal Brands: Wait for It
• Personal Brands: It Don’t Mean a Thing

You can find Nance on
Facebook
LinkedIn
Twitter

You probably believe you’ve dialed in reality by now. You know how you roll and how the world turns. You think it’s a rat race or a breeze, chaotic or linear.

You may even think you know who you are in the hearts and mind of people who meet you and interact with you.

How would your life change if you changed the channel?

That’s really all you have to do to keep becoming the person you want to be or could be. You have to keep changing – or at least re-considering: what you think, what you do, where you go, who you hang with, how you look, what you wear, what you carry and what you really want in this life.

No, I don’t mean leaving your job today to become an astronaut in training, if you haven’t yet been accepted to that program. I do mean putting astronaut on your life list so your mind can do the work to get you into space. It will, if you will.

If you can say it, you can do it.

I own that phrase but you may borrow it.

Fill yourself with the feeling that you are missing something great. Talk to yourself about how much you don’t want to miss out.

My niece Lexy came from New Jersey into LA last week. For the first time, she saw a totally different self: same girl, just radically different aspirations. She breathed in the sun, without the humidity. She long-boarded on the strand, she wore high heels for the first time, she talked late into the night about coming back, to go to UCLA.

She was an “only child,” for the first time – not sharing airtime with an older brother and sister.  She began to understand that her world could be “Lexy-centric.” She realized the soundtrack to her life wasn’t fixed with the voices of people whose job it was to tell her what to do. That’s their job now, but it won’t be forever.

So much unfolded in such a short time, simply because Lexy boarded an airplane that took her into a different direction and a never before seen dimension. The complexion of her life is changed forever, simply by putting herself on unfamiliar ground. And, she looks good with a tan.

Where do you need to go in order to re-consider who you are now or might be in the future? More from Nance…

• Personal Brands: Wait for It
• Personal Brands: It Don’t Mean a Thing

You can find Nance on
Facebook
LinkedIn
Twitter

You probably believe you’ve dialed in reality by now. You know how you roll and how the world turns. You think it’s a rat race or a breeze, chaotic or linear.

You may even think you know who you are in the hearts and mind of people who meet you and interact with you.

How would your life change if you changed the channel?

That’s really all you have to do to keep becoming the person you want to be or could be. You have to keep changing – or at least re-considering: what you think, what you do, where you go, who you hang with, how you look, what you wear, what you carry and what you really want in this life.

No, I don’t mean leaving your job today to become an astronaut in training, if you haven’t yet been accepted to that program. I do mean putting astronaut on your life list so your mind can do the work to get you into space. It will, if you will.

If you can say it, you can do it.

I own that phrase but you may borrow it.

Fill yourself with the feeling that you are missing something great. Talk to yourself about how much you don’t want to miss out.

My niece Lexy came from New Jersey into LA last week. For the first time, she saw a totally different self: same girl, just radically different aspirations. She breathed in the sun, without the humidity. She long-boarded on the strand, she wore high heels for the first time, she talked late into the night about coming back, to go to UCLA.

She was an “only child,” for the first time – not sharing airtime with an older brother and sister.  She began to understand that her world could be “Lexy-centric.” She realized the soundtrack to her life wasn’t fixed with the voices of people whose job it was to tell her what to do. That’s their job now, but it won’t be forever.

So much unfolded in such a short time, simply because Lexy boarded an airplane that took her into a different direction and a never before seen dimension. The complexion of her life is changed forever, simply by putting herself on unfamiliar ground. And, she looks good with a tan.

Where do you need to go in order to re-consider who you are now or might be in the future? More from Nance…

• Personal Brands: Wait for It
• Personal Brands: It Don’t Mean a Thing

You can find Nance on
Facebook
LinkedIn
Twitter

You probably believe you’ve dialed in reality by now. You know how you roll and how the world turns. You think it’s a rat race or a breeze, chaotic or linear.

You may even think you know who you are in the hearts and mind of people who meet you and interact with you.

How would your life change if you changed the channel?

That’s really all you have to do to keep becoming the person you want to be or could be. You have to keep changing – or at least re-considering: what you think, what you do, where you go, who you hang with, how you look, what you wear, what you carry and what you really want in this life.

No, I don’t mean leaving your job today to become an astronaut in training, if you haven’t yet been accepted to that program. I do mean putting astronaut on your life list so your mind can do the work to get you into space. It will, if you will.

If you can say it, you can do it.

I own that phrase but you may borrow it.

Fill yourself with the feeling that you are missing something great. Talk to yourself about how much you don’t want to miss out.

My niece Lexy came from New Jersey into LA last week. For the first time, she saw a totally different self: same girl, just radically different aspirations. She breathed in the sun, without the humidity. She long-boarded on the strand, she wore high heels for the first time, she talked late into the night about coming back, to go to UCLA.

She was an “only child,” for the first time – not sharing airtime with an older brother and sister.  She began to understand that her world could be “Lexy-centric.” She realized the soundtrack to her life wasn’t fixed with the voices of people whose job it was to tell her what to do. That’s their job now, but it won’t be forever.

So much unfolded in such a short time, simply because Lexy boarded an airplane that took her into a different direction and a never before seen dimension. The complexion of her life is changed forever, simply by putting herself on unfamiliar ground. And, she looks good with a tan.

Where do you need to go in order to re-consider who you are now or might be in the future? More from Nance…

• Personal Brands: Wait for It
• Personal Brands: It Don’t Mean a Thing

You can find Nance on
Facebook
LinkedIn
Twitter

You probably believe you’ve dialed in reality by now. You know how you roll and how the world turns. You think it’s a rat race or a breeze, chaotic or linear.

You may even think you know who you are in the hearts and mind of people who meet you and interact with you.

How would your life change if you changed the channel?

That’s really all you have to do to keep becoming the person you want to be or could be. You have to keep changing – or at least re-considering: what you think, what you do, where you go, who you hang with, how you look, what you wear, what you carry and what you really want in this life.

No, I don’t mean leaving your job today to become an astronaut in training, if you haven’t yet been accepted to that program. I do mean putting astronaut on your life list so your mind can do the work to get you into space. It will, if you will.

If you can say it, you can do it.

I own that phrase but you may borrow it.

Fill yourself with the feeling that you are missing something great. Talk to yourself about how much you don’t want to miss out.

My niece Lexy came from New Jersey into LA last week. For the first time, she saw a totally different self: same girl, just radically different aspirations. She breathed in the sun, without the humidity. She long-boarded on the strand, she wore high heels for the first time, she talked late into the night about coming back, to go to UCLA.

She was an “only child,” for the first time – not sharing airtime with an older brother and sister.  She began to understand that her world could be “Lexy-centric.” She realized the soundtrack to her life wasn’t fixed with the voices of people whose job it was to tell her what to do. That’s their job now, but it won’t be forever.

So much unfolded in such a short time, simply because Lexy boarded an airplane that took her into a different direction and a never before seen dimension. The complexion of her life is changed forever, simply by putting herself on unfamiliar ground. And, she looks good with a tan.

Where do you need to go in order to re-consider who you are now or might be in the future? More from Nance…

• Personal Brands: Wait for It
• Personal Brands: It Don’t Mean a Thing

You can find Nance on
Facebook
LinkedIn
Twitter

You probably believe you’ve dialed in reality by now. You know how you roll and how the world turns. You think it’s a rat race or a breeze, chaotic or linear.

You may even think you know who you are in the hearts and mind of people who meet you and interact with you.

How would your life change if you changed the channel?

That’s really all you have to do to keep becoming the person you want to be or could be. You have to keep changing – or at least re-considering: what you think, what you do, where you go, who you hang with, how you look, what you wear, what you carry and what you really want in this life.

No, I don’t mean leaving your job today to become an astronaut in training, if you haven’t yet been accepted to that program. I do mean putting astronaut on your life list so your mind can do the work to get you into space. It will, if you will.

If you can say it, you can do it.

I own that phrase but you may borrow it.

Fill yourself with the feeling that you are missing something great. Talk to yourself about how much you don’t want to miss out.

My niece Lexy came from New Jersey into LA last week. For the first time, she saw a totally different self: same girl, just radically different aspirations. She breathed in the sun, without the humidity. She long-boarded on the strand, she wore high heels for the first time, she talked late into the night about coming back, to go to UCLA.

She was an “only child,” for the first time – not sharing airtime with an older brother and sister.  She began to understand that her world could be “Lexy-centric.” She realized the soundtrack to her life wasn’t fixed with the voices of people whose job it was to tell her what to do. That’s their job now, but it won’t be forever.

So much unfolded in such a short time, simply because Lexy boarded an airplane that took her into a different direction and a never before seen dimension. The complexion of her life is changed forever, simply by putting herself on unfamiliar ground. And, she looks good with a tan.

Where do you need to go in order to re-consider who you are now or might be in the future? More from Nance…

• Personal Brands: Wait for It
• Personal Brands: It Don’t Mean a Thing

You can find Nance on
Facebook
LinkedIn
Twitter

You probably believe you’ve dialed in reality by now. You know how you roll and how the world turns. You think it’s a rat race or a breeze, chaotic or linear.

You may even think you know who you are in the hearts and mind of people who meet you and interact with you.

How would your life change if you changed the channel?

That’s really all you have to do to keep becoming the person you want to be or could be. You have to keep changing – or at least re-considering: what you think, what you do, where you go, who you hang with, how you look, what you wear, what you carry and what you really want in this life.

No, I don’t mean leaving your job today to become an astronaut in training, if you haven’t yet been accepted to that program. I do mean putting astronaut on your life list so your mind can do the work to get you into space. It will, if you will.

If you can say it, you can do it.

I own that phrase but you may borrow it.

Fill yourself with the feeling that you are missing something great. Talk to yourself about how much you don’t want to miss out.

My niece Lexy came from New Jersey into LA last week. For the first time, she saw a totally different self: same girl, just radically different aspirations. She breathed in the sun, without the humidity. She long-boarded on the strand, she wore high heels for the first time, she talked late into the night about coming back, to go to UCLA.

She was an “only child,” for the first time – not sharing airtime with an older brother and sister.  She began to understand that her world could be “Lexy-centric.” She realized the soundtrack to her life wasn’t fixed with the voices of people whose job it was to tell her what to do. That’s their job now, but it won’t be forever.

So much unfolded in such a short time, simply because Lexy boarded an airplane that took her into a different direction and a never before seen dimension. The complexion of her life is changed forever, simply by putting herself on unfamiliar ground. And, she looks good with a tan.

Where do you need to go in order to re-consider who you are now or might be in the future? More from Nance…

• Personal Brands: Wait for It
• Personal Brands: It Don’t Mean a Thing

You can find Nance on
Facebook
LinkedIn
Twitter

You probably believe you’ve dialed in reality by now. You know how you roll and how the world turns. You think it’s a rat race or a breeze, chaotic or linear.

You may even think you know who you are in the hearts and mind of people who meet you and interact with you.

How would your life change if you changed the channel?

That’s really all you have to do to keep becoming the person you want to be or could be. You have to keep changing – or at least re-considering: what you think, what you do, where you go, who you hang with, how you look, what you wear, what you carry and what you really want in this life.

No, I don’t mean leaving your job today to become an astronaut in training, if you haven’t yet been accepted to that program. I do mean putting astronaut on your life list so your mind can do the work to get you into space. It will, if you will.

If you can say it, you can do it.

I own that phrase but you may borrow it.

Fill yourself with the feeling that you are missing something great. Talk to yourself about how much you don’t want to miss out.

My niece Lexy came from New Jersey into LA last week. For the first time, she saw a totally different self: same girl, just radically different aspirations. She breathed in the sun, without the humidity. She long-boarded on the strand, she wore high heels for the first time, she talked late into the night about coming back, to go to UCLA.

She was an “only child,” for the first time – not sharing airtime with an older brother and sister.  She began to understand that her world could be “Lexy-centric.” She realized the soundtrack to her life wasn’t fixed with the voices of people whose job it was to tell her what to do. That’s their job now, but it won’t be forever.

So much unfolded in such a short time, simply because Lexy boarded an airplane that took her into a different direction and a never before seen dimension. The complexion of her life is changed forever, simply by putting herself on unfamiliar ground. And, she looks good with a tan.

Where do you need to go in order to re-consider who you are now or might be in the future? More from Nance…

• Personal Brands: Wait for It
• Personal Brands: It Don’t Mean a Thing

You can find Nance on
Facebook
LinkedIn
Twitter

You take your clothes to the dry cleaner. They say it all be ready on Saturday. You go in. Not ready. You’re leaving for New York and they’ve got your best suit. It’s the lucky one – the one where you’ve gotten every offer or every deal in the last two years. Your suit is being held hostage.

What do you do?

Do you listen to the excuses and nod knowingly?

Do you get loud and insist that it must be done right away?

Do you worry that your lucky suit won’t be so lucky when they are finished with it?

How you act in the bad times, the challenging times and the times when you are furious – that’s part of your personal brand. And, depending on what you do – especially if you do a lot: these “challenging” times will come pretty often.

Anger is not only bad for your body but it’s really bad for your business. Anger is bad when you feel it and it’s bad when the guy you’re interacting with has it. Anger makes people stupid. Furious makes anger go faster.

Reach for a better feeling thought. Tell yourself a different story. Get creative before you get enraged.

They do have your suit. Or your footage. Or your case. They haven’t done the job. It’s not going to get better if you get louder.

It will get better when you use your indoor voice. Coke doesn’t scream at its competitors. Coke exacts its revenge by cheerfully attracting more fans.

When vendors go bad you’ll find this to be true: the angriest people are going to be the ones who did you the greatest harm. If the conversation gets louder, you’re still going to wait for it – it just won’t be in great shape when you get it.

How well does anger play into your brand promise?

It shouldn’t be part of it, unless you are a watch dog – whose job it is to make people afraid and back off. Not follow-through. More from Nance…

• Personal Brands: It Don’t Mean a Thing
• Personal Brands: Ugly Entrepreneurs

You can find Nance on
Facebook
LinkedIn
Twitter

Great parties like great sex depend on variety. Different styles, attitudes, even intentions: spice it up – give it that zing. Really great parties, like great sustainable romance, need surprise, along with the two other key elements of happiness: pleasure and meaning.

So if your life or your job is no party: you know what to do.

How often do you surprise the people around you? How often are you surprised?

How often do your bring them pleasure (brilliant work, letting them go home while you take the late shift, or cleaning up after the big project goes out). How often do the people around you bring you pleasure?

And meaning: what are you doing? Are you just making money? Not good enough to sustain your effort. You’ve got to make meaning; ideally you’re making it with the people you work with.

We just celebrated two birthdays with a great party on Saturday night: my boyfriend and his dad share a birth date. They are separated by 21 years and typically 3,000 miles. So Dad bridged the gap and flew into LA with Mom. And, we invited our 35 of our closest friends, who brought 15 strangers who are now friends. I dubbed it the “Meet the Parents Day” party.

Here’s what’s cool.

Guests ranged from 20 to 85 years of age. We had a mash up of personal brands. Outgoing, smart, funny, pious, ambitious, lay back, experienced, newbies, literate and kinetic.

We had dueling men of the cloth (actually 5 religions present), attorneys, business owners, professional athletes, students, receptionists, our maintenance man at work and a guy who raises exotic lizards (who knew?). Twenty countries represented if you include this generation and back one more to ancestors. There isn’t a composite that would represent “friend” in our lives: not anything that could be combined to become a persona that we could recognize as people we adore. As a marketer, that stings: we like target markets that think alike, act alike and buy alike. In the house Saturday night, the only thing we all had in common was we were glad to be together.

We laughed, ate, sang, chatted, took photos, drank a bit and some of us: a bit too much. We built a cupcake holder in the middle of dinner, filled it and then ate the contents.

Our clean-up crew didn’t show: so the partiers danced and did dishes to heavy metal music. It was like being in camp, making a show, being players and audience, being chefs and hoppers, eating and then doing KP.

Life doesn’t mean a thing, if you don’t get that zing. When was the last time you danced and did dishes? I hope really often.

Get outside your personal brand and the tribe you always hang with: so you can see how you mesh, complement, clash and makes a mess with people who are so not like you. Go out of your way to like them. Find something to enjoy in even the challenging people around you.

This is your party.

It’s life and work, friends and family, staying home and traveling, working out and eating too much. You can have it all, if you venture out. Give yourself a way to mix it up, surprise yourself and others, give and get pleasure and always seek to make and find meaning.

The birthday boys nearly forgot to open presents. That’s how great a party can be. More from Nance…

• Personal Brands: Ugly Entrepreneurs
• Personal Brands: SEO Yourself

You can find Nance on
Facebook
LinkedIn
Twitter

Making sausage next to a stockyard is prettier than entrepreneurs behave. Often chaotic, angry, distracted by shiny objects, chasing money, yelling at employees – let’s visit with the tribe of ugly entrepreneurs.

Vanderbilt, Carnegie, Rockefeller and Huntington were all really ugly people. Maybe not in the face but definitely in the way they behaved toward the people who were paid to act out their dreams and dramas.

There is still not an entrepreneur I would like, if I didn’t love their drive, vision, persistence, wild-eyed belief that theirs is the next great urinal, DNA identification biologic, or high-end green car (see WIRED July 2010).

These people, like a mother searching a crowded Wal-Mart for a missing child, are crazed. Determined. Distressed at the lack of urgency everyone else is showing. With bags under their eyes and hair that’s falling out or could be washed more often, the symptoms they manifest often are really ugly. But, it’s the “squash you up against a wall to get where they believe the lost is found,” that is exactly why we need them.

Personal brands: if you want balance you are not an entrepreneur.

Not everyone who will be wildly successful must be entrepreneur. Some people have real talent or great genes.

Brad Pitt and George Clooney are just genetically handsome, and equally born to be bad actors. Angelina Jolie leverages a past that captivates us like a beautiful Amy Winehouse would. And those are just the movie-star types who, like a savant playing Mozart at the age of three, have “it.” Pick any field – like advertising – where being great really means being blessed to think in phrases no longer than seven words about any consumer product. 

The jingle writer. The fashion editor. The artisan craftsman who knows something about the way wood reshapes itself in humidity.  These are not people with a personal brand that emanates “entrepreneur,” You can tell because there is something awesome and elegant – in the Albert Ellis definition – about what these people do, which flowers directly from their soul like roses on a fence at a winery.

Entrepreneurs are not elegant. They are the Henry Jagloms of acting, not the Cary Grants.

Personal brands: do not take on the challenge of being an entrepreneur. It’s not something you don like a mediocre university professor wears his cap and gown at graduation each year, indistinguishable from the truly distinguished academics.

Entrepreneurs are part of a personal brand family. Like all the Gillette brand family of stuff designed to make shaving more … more of what we apparently want from shaving. Entrepreneurs are in a family of persona brands like the inscrutable relationship between a whole bunch of different Kellogg cereals. They are both different and the same. They won’t share a grocery store shelf with ketchup.

You know who you are if you are an entrepreneur. You cannot stop embarrassing yourself with the odious qualities of endless, rampant and disquieting noise that is what it take to make something exist that before you did not exist. You alone among us can stand the failure, the lack of support, and the withering looks of someone who likes vacations and a tidy desk.

Entrepreneurs are an ugly tribe, and without them, we’d never have the waterless urinal, the discovery of the gene that leads to Parkinson’s disease or the upscale, environmentally sensitive sports car that takes us into the future.

Entrepreneurs, as my mother used to say about our pug dog: you are so ugly, you are beautiful. More from Nance…

• Personal Brands: SEO Yourself
• Personal Brands: Let Me Entertain You

You can find Nance on
Facebook
LinkedIn
Twitter

What ARE the right key words – especially, OMG if you are actually talking to someone face-to-face – or at least cell-to-cell? What are you saying – and how clearly are you communicating it online and offline? You get so much good stuff about your online behavior, I want to touch on the you that is hopefully off the computer from time to time, and on a call, presentation, meeting or some other conversation.

The rules don’t change from online to offline – which means your online self must be aligned with your real life self, unless you’re doing something that would disgrace your family.

When successful personal brands speak, they are crisp, clear, compelling, consistent and relentless. That doesn’t mean bombarding someone with “why don’t you buy from me?” messages. Or, “buy now or risk losing out!” Those are pretty clear, but fail the test of the other rules.

The bar for your personal brand’s key words has got to be what is:

1. Authentically true for you
2. What you want people to see you as a purveyor of
3. Clearing connecting with your audience’s interest and concerns
4. Legitimately delivering so that your audience receives the utmost results
5. Promoted in a way that delivers your intention as much as “the goods”

 Leave Your Passion in The Bedroom – or Hobby Room.

Definitive keywords are not about passion. Passion doesn’t play a part in personal branding. Passion does play a part in personal development – and that is the distinction.

Developmental psychology addresses the stages of maturation, and sets standards for what you do as a normal 8 year old, that isn’t the right behavior on a date when your 28 years old.

In other words, passions change. Think of when you were drinking wheat grass everyday, or desperately wanted tickets to the Goo Dolls, or dated your neighbor. Some passions leave more residue than others. I may be revealing too much here. 

On the other hand, if you are a passionate person – someone who invests themselves fully, and unceasingly strives to bring benefits to others: you can keep up your passion play. Personal brands are passionate about their audiences or as Seth Godin calls them your tribes.

When you see yourself not in the mirror but as a metaphorical bridge between your audience’s real lives and their ideal lives, you’re starting with a winning strategy.

Do you know your audience and their unmet needs?

Exactly who are the people and businesses you seek to serve and derive revenue and profit  from?

Where are they? 

Have you chosen a large enough segment so you don’t have to do an endless number of one-offs, but can syndicate the time it has taken to learn what you do really well?

When you are keyed in on the words and thoughts that express the pain and craving your can remedy, you begin to SEO yourself. You become a walking, talking advertisement for who you are and what you do.

Only then is my adage true: if you can say it, you can live it. More from Nance…

• Personal Brands: Let Me Entertain You
• Personal Brands: Thoughts and Tears

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We’re having a BBQ with about 50 people up at my house in a few weeks. It’ll be in August, which weirdly enough, is when about a full third of my family and friends are born. So it’s always a big party, featuring crowd favs like ribs, beer and cake.  What could be bad? Nothing if I survive my drive to entertain.

Among the characteristics of my personal brand is “entertaining” and not just for guests at home. I speak, train and teach at venues where audiences are no longer satisfied by being educated or enlightened. “Adult learners” must be simultaneously entertained as they graze on facts and analysis.  Someone coined a word for what we do now in the knowledge transfer business: “edutainment.” I don’t have a casual relationship with this concept, because I believe it the single most important factor in moving people forward. With all my might, I relentlessly edu-tain.

Personal brands aren’t something you can turn off and on at will. Qualities that are authentically you will come through in most every venue.

For example, I am known for throwing really great parties because I believe that you must entertain guests. I see it as part of the job when you host a party. I have developed a formula. I like to splurge on a real bartender. He makes signature drinks and margaritas with that tiny shaved ice, like Slurpees (I bought the machine). We have live music (I live in LA where musicians are desperate for an audience much less a pay check). And I always add in something novel to up the cool factor and kind of make it a scene.

This summer my cool factor is futons instead of chaise lounges. It’s got that Beverly Hills Hotel cabana, Hollywood’s Hotel Roosevelt bottle service cum Vegas Rehab with beautiful people lounging vibe.

This is where it gets ugly.

The best place to buy cheap futons is IKEA. If there’s a store that’s more grueling to move through, filled with more screaming children and surly customer no-service people at the checkout, then it must be in hell.

Other than hell, which I can only imagine is IKEA without air-conditioning, there could be no other place where you are trapped with hundreds of other lost souls, as your brain is assaulted with the smell of damp Swedish meatballs and you try to find your way out from the moment you get in. On the floors you see arrows, but they return you to the same places you came from.

Okay, it gets worse.

We persevere, gripping our soiled list of product numbers, plus awkwardly juggling a tower of assorted doo-dads we picked up on the way down.  How could you resist? They force you to pass every single item ever made in Sweden on the way, three stories down, to the self-serve warehouse.

We arrive at the beginning of the end. We make our way through a maze of towering aisles and pull hundreds of pounds of futon assemblage and mattresses off the shelves, only to push them around in a side-less steel cart that hits you right in the curve between your leg and ankle.

It’s still not as bad as it’s going to get.

We pay after fumbling with what looks like a taser, and is actually an optical scanner that only works at a very specific distance and angle. We wobble our way out to pick-up zone.

Therein lies the difference between IKEA and hell.

Above our heads – like lettuce in a supermarket – is a power shower of wet mist pouring out of a cable strung all across the overhang between the store and the curb.

This is where you must wait with your cardboard and plastic covered, yet to be assembled furniture. Now we know it’s not hell, because we’re wet and freezing. We are literally standing in a monsoon with our cardboard shack and plastic tarp wrapped mattresses, all soaking wet.

“It’s to keep you cool,” says the lone attendant. Now if you don’t know, Los Angeles is about 78 degrees by day and 65 degrees by evening during most of the summer, with no drag of humidity. This is not Phoenix, Orlando, Houston or anyplace where having buckets of water thrown at you is really the only way to manage your body temperature outdoors.

Blame it on my personal brand. I endured because I must entertain. The show must go on. The mantra doesn’t waver when you are authentically what you are, no matter where you are.

In case you are navel gazing about your own personal brand, ask yourself this. What do you endure that tells you who you are?

• Personal Brands: Thoughts and Tears
• Personal Brands: Do Ask. Don’t Tell.

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Country western music makes me cry – in part because it’s my daughter’s favorite genre (which is a mom-thing, stuff that reminds your mom of you makes her cry, too). I also cry because they tell such poignant stories about heartache, ambition and simple living.

What’s remarkable to me? Unlike any other genre, country western lyricists work Jesus into songs like he’s a neighbor. It’s not the same as Christian music where Jesus is central to the message. Country music sings about Jesus, in the same song where they sing about beer or driving really fast.

From Brooks and Dunn’s That Red Dirt Road:

“That’s where I drank my first beer. That’s where I found Jesus. That’s where I wrecked my first car, tore it all to pieces.”

It’s where I found Jesus

They sandwiched Jesus in between the real life of a young man’s drinking and driving. Hopefully they’re not insinuating doing both at the same time  – although that might be when Jesus is much needed, under the circumstances.

Point is: without a doubt Jesus is a thought leader. He’s a famous person who appears really accessible and meaningful to many people.

Now who are you singing about?

Who are the thought leaders that should be on your lips? Who are the key opinion leaders with whom you need to have an intimate relationship? You may never meet them. You can access them by reading their books or blogs, applying their teachings or perspective to your work/life – and maybe attending a seminar they lead.

Point is: you need to access people with knowledge and perspective that is superior to yours, so you have a way to get more comfortable with the challenges you face – and have the courage to actively seek out greater objectives.

Make A List

I have a long list, some famous like Seth Godin and Guy Kawasaki, and some less so like Ichak Adizes and Rick Maurer. I enjoy a bit of an unfair advantage – I hosted International Business on public radio plus done lots of other media: so I’ve gotten to interview, and share a stage and editorial space with many thought leaders.

But, no one has an excuse to be under-informed. Now it doesn’t take a whole lot of effort to intimately know anyone: philosophers and kings, corporate titans and corporate critics. Go online, find, review, apply and repeat your new perspective.

Do This

Make a list of whom you should know or at least brush up against, by looking at their material. Let the best of them influence you. Interact with them on blogs or forums, and most importantly let great thinking (theirs, yours or an amalgam) be a natural way for you to produce great work. More from Nance…

• Personal Brands: Do Ask. Don’t Tell.
• Personal Brands: Hate and Disorder

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“When is it appropriate for me to criticize my co-worker?”  I got the question from a young manager in my course: Pitching the Perfect Presentation, on campus at UCLA last week.

I felt flooded by the power to disabuse an entire group of people about an entirely inappropriate – yet pervasive – kind of communication: delivering unasked for criticism. I thought I’d expand on my academic platform and let you in on the etiquette.

Have you ever asked for permission before you criticized a colleague, friend, family member, neighbor or significant other? And not, “Hey, it’s time for me to criticize you: ready?” Nor telling them to brace themselves, “Here’s a heaping cup o’ criticism, coming your way!”

The concept of delivering “constructive criticism” is often obfuscation. It masks the intention of unloading a gnarled mess of “perspective” on someone who is (or is not) living out your dream of how their job (or life) should be done.

Maybe you don’t think you need to ask. After all, if your personal brand is “boss” or “know-it-all” then: fire away, right? Or, because your personal brand is defined as “role-model for those behind me on the path,” you have a duty to be corrector-in-chief, doncha?

So, I stood in front of the class and thought about the God given right to criticize. I thought about when God would give it. Other than “back away: the stove is hot!” do we have a duty to admonish someone on something where we know better? Or, think we know better?

It is a funny question because I teach. I coach. I talk at people from inside the television and tell strangers what I think they MUST do.

My personal brand and my job title invite people to come to me when they want to move further and faster in their careers. When someone signs up for that, I make sure I’ve been deputized to deliver feedback as part of our working relationship. In fact, I make sure that honesty isn’t optional and that I’ll only talk about what I know at a world-class level. Only then can I deliver feedback.

Feedback is not criticism.

What does feedback look like? Direction. Encouragement. And, when necessary: the recommendation to change course, see additional choices or consider that one choice obviates another. You cannot be both an astronaut, and Kate plus 8.

So what’s the difference between criticism and feedback? The giver and receiver must think of feedback as a gift. You wouldn’t package poop and hand it to someone as a gift. You wouldn’t accept that as a gift.

And, you must have permission. As my friend Bob Gregoire says, simply ask: “Would you like my feedback on that?”

Here’s my feedback protocol.

1. Share what you see as positive and powerful about what your receiver is doing – or wants to do – or has made an effort toward doing.

2. Then, share what would strengthen their performance, product or presentation.

And, if you are throwing a lateral – interacting with a peer, co-worker or friend – be as quick to ask for feedback, as you are to give it.  That will slow down the urge to share, won’t it? More from Nance…

• Personal Brands: Hate and Disorder
• Personal Brands: The Audition

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How are you doing amidst the piles you’ve created? You know, the piles of old bills, dirty clothes and detritus of your hobbies (like your carnival stuffed animal collection or unusable swag from less than stellar events)?

Maybe it’s not your clutter. Maybe it’s your roommate’s mess, or your office mate’s. Maybe you inherited it from a well-meaning relative who filled up your place with her old furniture or your work ancestor: the person who sat at your desk or cubicle before you arrived.

Are you worn down, filled with disgust and furious while living in the small margins of space that aren’t covered with dust or mold or worse? Have you come to hate the space you occupy? We know if you have, even if we haven’t seen the place you’re at. Hating disorder and not taking action to clean it up is fomenting a negative attitude toward the world, and making a marked, negative impression of your personal brand on us.

Things that would be trash often surround us in life. Why does this make us mad – either crazy or crazy plus angry? Because it is irrational to be burdened by garbage you must face or sift though in order to do something rational: like live well or work smart.

Don’t kid yourself that someone in Haiti might need a pair of running shoes that are stained from two years of roadwork, accompanied by the molting socks you left in them. Anyway, stashing them in a pile in the corner is not serving the needy, who are not so needy that they want to wear your garbage.

Maybe Your Space is Clean but Your Mind Holds Toxic Waste

Some of us enjoy near pristine physical environments while surrounded by virtual trash: like brain litter born of mean-spirited emails and IMs. Our minds are juiced with the debris of unfair accusations about our talents or intellect. Our honest accomplishments are stacked up on a musty, dusty foundation of “you are less and I am more” reviews of bad bosses, jealous colleagues, dysfunctional family members and BFFs who have breached what you deserve: a sarcophagus of self-worth.

It is my experience that people who come from clutter: space wise or brain wise, speak the angriest and ugliest words. It’s like a haze of brown and grey smog infects them and thwarts oxygen or common courtesy from entering their brains. And, we all have experienced GIGO: garbage in and garbage out. Garbage doesn’t require a fancy algorithm to display results. Garbage is a pretty straight-forward producer of more garbage.

So, how are you doing, as we turn the corner on the second half of this year? It is too late for Spring-cleaning, but you can still lose weight for summer. That is: take the time to toss the stuff that is weighing you down before the days get shorter on their own.

Personal brands: unburden yourself now and let the sunny side of life lift you up and past your old behavior or the behavior of people who should be dropped off in the don’t recycle bin of “toxic people I used to put up with.” Go through your so-called friends or followers and hold onto the real, good ones: the nourishing, wise and in-your-corner ones.

With the spaciousness you create in your real, psychological and social media space you’ll re-gain the ability to map out what you really want in your life. If you got a holiday day off or two, come back into our lives free of the clutter that’s made you mad.

Infuse and surround your personal brand with the best stuff: inside and out. More from Nance…

• Personal Brands: The Audition
• Personal Brands: Stick It

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